I thought about posting something here for awhile. A friend asked me what’s the delay, a lot of things I guess. Some of it was laziness and lethargy, some of it the insecurity that clings to all writing, but mostly it was doubt; doubting that the last four months could be done justice in the form of a blog post. The words needed to express my gratitude to all the people who helped me through clicks in somewhere beyond infinity. My  mother alone deserves a cool trillion herself, or trillion billion, or whatever the numerical conversion of “hey, thanks for saving my life”—and meaning it with every strand of my soul—-works itself out to be.

You see my predicament? And that’s before even touching on the actual transplant—-how four bags of marrow and blood and preservatives can be streamed through an IV and offer resurrection. Even then it would still feel as if I’ve short changed things, left out something intrinsic to the whole process.

So for the the sake of time and sanity I’ve decided to  push aside doubt and move on to acceptance. I can’t sum this all up and hand it over in one pretty post no matter how many times I write and rewrite it, the words and talent just aren’t there. Instead it will unwind itself over time and when it feels right, I’ll do my best to write on it.

After a four month absence it seems an update is in order. The best way to put it is this: last July I posted  on the joys of a single doctor’s visit without a blood transfusion. This July my update is no transfusions in three months, ten days and a few hours. My blood no longer inspires excitement or physician’s curiosity; my blood is delightfully boring.

With that in mind the tone of this blog will certainly change, no longer will it be a sick person complaining about the healthcare industry, but instead the substantially more annoying alternative—-a healthier person doing the same.

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