My PICC Line

My personal journey, with aplastic anemia, through the healthcare industry

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Entries for the ‘essays’ Category

Papa Joe says No

My move to the West Coast has meant spending most of my time seeing doctors. A good bone marrow transplant demands preparation. But when there is some down time, it’s spent with my caregiver. She’s the only person I know out here. She’s also my mother. She has a thing for asking me questions about [...]

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My Turn on the Table

I worked for a pain management doctor before I was told I couldn’t work anymore. We did procedures. Laid the patient face down on the table and poked and prodded, usually, along the spine. Often the needles were large. Over a half of a year, I saw people react very differently to these “procedures.” Some [...]

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When doctors disagree

The Roman philosopher Cicero said “In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men.” At times you will meet a doctor who buys this. More times, however, you will meet patients who do. As was the case with an older gentleman  I spoke with briefly in a waiting room [...]

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Anything for me…

I check my e-mail often. Once, twice, fifteen times a day. My messages are always read in the order they’re received.
The first is from an old friend who wants to do know what they can do to help. Anything, they write, really anything you need. They ask me how I’m feeling, if I think I’m [...]

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A Meeting with Will

On a sunny Wednesday with a high, cloudless sky, a boy sits on a bench. He sits slightly hunched, vacantly gazing off, on just one of the many benches outside this particular medical center. He sits with a head full of thoughts and a growing awareness that his story, so important to him, is fantastically dull when grouped [...]

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Another busy day in the factory

The waiting room is full of us today, anxious people waiting to see our doctor. There are 13 or 14 of us in this room, and in a another one down the hall, 13 or 14 more. This pattern continues on for quite sometime—this is a big place, like factory big. Before we found ourselves [...]

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Week in a mask

If I’m out, I’m wearing a mask—one of those easter egg blue surgical ones.
Its Monday. I walk down the frozen food aisle of the local grocer. A mother pulls her children away from me, pulls them away from the guy who must have some  horrific disease or he wouldn’t be wearing that thing. I laugh [...]

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A case of anger

I hate to bring up the past, but here’s a story. Three weeks ago, before I knew my brother was not a match, before I underwent the ATG treatment, I met with the bone marrow  transplant team. Standard procedure. Thought being, if my brother is a match we have all the semantics out of the [...]

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My nemesis

I’ve developed an enemy since my diagnosis, he’s sleek, shiny, a real hot shot. He looks like a dream but when it comes to work, he’s a lazy S.O.B. Always missing spots, leaving just a little something behind, never going the extra mile, you know the type. This morning we battled for 30 minutes before [...]

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A 23 year old who can’t file his own toe nails

It’s 3 a.m. in the 5th floor of the hospital I’ve called home for the last three days.  It’s dark, it’s quiet andI have to make a run to the bathroom. But I can’t. My medication leaves me in an altered state of mind, it leaves me dizzy. If I fall I could bleed, my body doesn’t have much blood to spare. I press [...]

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